Another day pronounced

And this Day Begins:

For Will.......

" Yesterday we sat among pines and thorns Writing metaphors while birds filled the woods. Stop one brief instant while branches mourn, Hiding grief and shame among many moods, The group of us with dirty feet, torn nails, Life placed carefully beneath the roots of a tree. I remember Tuesday night because it hailed although watching through the window, I failed to go outside and gaze up with the others; the fire kept me inside, loving the flames. Later the warmth of soft and safe covers blanketed me from the day's rainy games. The day kept me in sync with my soul each time I write I am closer to whole."

March 7, 2008

Snow clings to the trees around the house as I waited for UPS to deliver Kansas City Steaks all day. I did find the package on the front pouch at 5 pm. Go figure.
Another week of doctors, new glasses, I look charming in Armani.

A week of loss. Yoska, Paul's sweet dog died yesterday. Paul is feeling the loss severely. My heart went out for him as he told me about the passing.

The poem above is dedicated to my dear friend Will. Will passed away two days ago.
His parents, from Manilus, NY. My heart again has experienced another serious crack. Will and I have been very close friends since 9/11/00. I will mourn his self imposed death. Will was having difficulty coming to terms about "us" and started sleeping around and met a young man from Paris only later to become infected with HIV/AIDS. After a month, he took his life. I will always hold a certain amount of guilt about his death. My heart cries, my chest withers. Another "thing" to carry privately in my head and heart. So, for Will, I write this poem. Tonight the world seems dark and confusing. Loss and gain mean nothing. I guess we all have our times of loss and great loss. I stopped counting friends dying from Denver days, at 87. Many more passed, but I stopped counting because of pain. I enabled countless to cope and survive for their months, days left.
Now the lesson is for practice for my survival. So many gone, and I still breath and live. I have decided to seek seclusion for my mental health. I am shutting off all phones and staying mute for one week. I shall read, and write from bottom of my broken heart and decidedly make sense of my world at large and regain my footing and balance. I promise to contact everyone after my week of rest.
Blessed Be
Joe